How can we control our children’s excessive fears?

Fear is a natural emotion for all of us. This fear is something we need. In every situation, we are careful not to break the law because of the fear of danger or punishment that may arise when we break it. However, that fear should not go beyond the limit. Various kinds of fears rule us. However, if these fears go beyond the limit, they can negatively affect our living conditions. Therefore, we need to be careful to control our excessive and unnecessary fears.

Fear is a very common thing in children. This fear is necessary in the right amount and for the right things. It is also an important part of their growth. However, when it becomes excessive, it can have a detrimental effect on the personality and living conditions of children. Knowingly or unknowingly, we instill fear in children. It causes fear to grow in children. We should not do that. We should only tell children what is true. What we should always give children is courage. However, it is our responsibility as parents to explain to them about the fear that they should have in a positive way. Children who are fearful will have to face many difficulties in life. If we do not control this fear properly at a young age, it can lead them to various kinds of worries. Problems experienced by the mother during and after pregnancy, as well as hereditary factors, can cause fear in children. Psychological studies say that problems such as anxiety and depression experienced by the mother during pregnancy can affect the personality of a child. Fears can manifest in many forms such as fear of strangers, fear of being alone, fear of the dark, fear of exams, and fear of failure. However, parents need to be careful not to let this become excessive or adversely affect their children’s daily lives. If fear starts to affect their children adversely, parents need to be prepared to adopt the right guidelines. Children with excessive fear naturally lose courage, and as their courage decreases, their self-confidence decreases. When self-confidence decreases, they may not be able to recognize their own abilities, no matter how talented they are, or even if they recognize them, they may not be able to use them properly to achieve great success in life. The insecure situation that children experience when they are young can also cause fear. An important symptom of fear is difficulty looking others in the face. Children with normal fears do not talk to others in person. Their gaze shifts in many directions. They do not talk to people much and speak well after people have left. They may stay away from social activities. Therefore, parents need to be aware of the need to control excessive fear in children and to instill confidence in them. Parents should understand the causes of fear in children and act accordingly. Unfamiliar situations such as a new school or home can cause anxiety and fear in children. It is possible that the parents’ fears can be transmitted to their children. Scary stories and movies may scare some children. Therefore, parents should set limits for their children to watch and listen to scary things. Traumatic experiences such as accidents, natural disasters, and the separation of parents can also cause children to develop fears. Teasing from peers and problems at school can sometimes make children fearful. V. Padre Pio says: “Do not be afraid. Pray and believe. God controls everything.”
There are a few things that parents can do to control excessive fear in children. We should teach our children to talk to us face to face. This will naturally increase their confidence and courage as they speak and reduce their fear. We should never raise our children to be afraid. We should raise them with good obedience and encouragement. We should train them to overcome fear and survive. In order to change their fear, we should change our life situations and take advantage of the opportunities for that. We should talk openly with our children about fear, do not ridicule them and accept their feelings. Parents should create a safe environment for their children at home. When we face life situations with confidence and courage without fear, it sets a good example for our children. We should help our children to give correct information about fear, change wrong information and misunderstandings, and think logically. We should never force children to do things that they are afraid of. This causes fear to increase. If children’s fears are having a detrimental effect on their daily lives, we should seek the help of a child psychologist or counselor. They can give them the right guidance and deal with their fears effectively. In Isaiah 41:10, God says: “Fear not, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Therefore, as parents, we can strive to understand our children’s fears correctly, provide them with the support they need, and thus raise them to be courageous. Through our love and support, children can overcome their fears healthily and face crises with self-confidence. Let us strive for that with patience and perseverance. In this way, we can mold a good generation with confidence and strength.